This thread is dedicated to stories, posts, comments about black females and asian males (AM/BF) relationships. For asian guys and black girls.

If you write something good, you may win a reward or prize!

I've dated black women quite a bit in my past. I grew up in NYC, and my best friend in high school was black. he introduced me to a lot of black girls, and over the years I still am attracted to black girls. Some are very nice, and some are very bitchy :) I don't think it has to do with race. It has a lot to do with their surroundings and their upbringing.

It's not true that black girls don't give oral. I'm just saying LMAO

^never heard that one before. Anyways I feel like I should say something in here but I have no topic ideas.

I appreciate women of all colours ; D

Im an EEO/EDO equal employment/dating opportunist. I prefer asian men, but if i had a good thing going with someone non asian, i would not throw it away for a possible "asian connection".  just because a person is asian doesn't exempt them from bieng a ass...:)

At the same time i find most asian guys hesitant around me, so there is always the gap of connection. I dont speak up, they dont speak up, so we just pass in the wind.. I also get odd looks cus many try to figure me out, race wise... and sadly, i feel that many "black" women are treated or seen differently, thus stereo typical speed bumps are in the way. This goes from "black" women to asian men too.. I get asked all the damn time "i heard they have small dick, is it true?"

My response "well bieng that i am not the official dick inspector, i should not speak, but I know that some do not have smaller packages..."

That question erks the shit out of me... cus other ethnicities prob come in all sizes too... Lets be frank! Any how any girl who ask me that, i dont have much respect for, they obviously have their priorities screwed..

Ill take loving guy with small useful kit over abusive/asshole with abundance anyday!

just felt like i should write or say something on this, since i did spend about close to 15 years in China.and until now all my male and female friends are Asian mostly East Asian.but the funny thing is that East Asian man in China are more open to talk and or dance with a black woman. but the ones that are in Canada (since i am living in canada now) i find these lovely man being so shy that makes a girl want to scream. it took one of my close friend (who is from east asia) it took him 6 years to tell me that he has a crush on me. but that dont matter no more because i dont feel the same way about him. so i do hear alot of people say that Asian man in the US mainly the Atlanta's or North Carolina...ect. that are less shy to approach black woman.But if i want to approach a Asian man and knowing he does speak Chinese or Guang dong hua, i just speak to him in that language and steal his attention and curiosity(all we need is to break the ice)

But then again. (Aniiko) girl. your right about what you said, there seems to have a big air between AM&BW.(in canada ) dont know about else where.

I think all relationships regardless of race are beautiful as long as its based on genuine love and not a fetish 

Am/Bw is the most rarest coupling however I am so happy to report seeing more and more couples in my area!

im hoping that more and more people will overcome the stereotypes and misconceptions about one another and come together harmoniously

=o) 

Hey everyone. I am from Montreal Canada. I am glad there is someone else from Canada here, Baobao83 where are you from? I also have dated black women quite a bit. My best friend growing up was black and my father lived in Nassau Bahamas for 10 years before coming to Montreal and moved us to a part of town that was predominantly black. A lot of my friends from school were black, that's how I met and dated a few black girls and I have always been attracted to black women.

My first post, and since there’s a prize involved, I’ve GOT to go for it…

Okay, I've seriously dated three black women up to now, and was married to one of them as well… So maybe I can shed some light, or at least set off a spark…

First of all, let’s destroy the myths.  

Starting with Asian men…

-MYTH:  Asian men treat our lovers better than men of other races do… That we’re more respectful, family oriented, etc.

-FACT:  Depends on how the man was raised. For example, how did his father treat his mother and sisters? What was his relationship with his mother and sisters like? The truth is that most of us treat our partners with what we consider to be respect, but some of us are womanizers, abusers, and assholes - just like the rest. Most of what comes out gets learned at home.

-MYTH:  Asian Men are shy, meek, and generally inept around women.

-FACT:  I’ll speak for myself first. My pop never taught me how to approach women, other than to bark out in his stoic Korean, “STUDY HARD, GET GOOD JOB, AND PRETTY OOMAN MARRY YOU!!!”… Well geez dad, thanks for that absolutely enlightening advice!... (Although it turns out that he wasn’t completely off-base… But that’s not what you want you hear when you’re 16)…  Anyways, it wasn’t ‘til I got older (and got tired of my five fingered lover) that I finally started to put myself out there more… The younger Azn cats I see now though, they’re coming up with more game. I tip my hat to them. If only I knew then what I know now…

-MYTH:  The Weenie Tot? The Ballpark Frank? Or the Kielbasa?

-FACT:  Okay, you KNOW we had to address this!!!... The fact is that it depends on the dude. Some dudes swing low and aim for the fences, some dudes are singles hitters, and others, well, that’s why there’s a pee wee league…. In other words, race does not always determine size… By the way, I KNOW someones bound to ask - I'm average. I’ve learned to stretch singles into doubles. My relationships are proof that I knew how to run the base paths – they kept coming back for more! ;)

And now, the Ladies…

-MYTH:  Black Women are Hotter Than Other Women in Bed. They can even bounce a quarter on their caboose!

-FACT:  YES! LOL… In all seriousness, if someone really turns you on, chances are that it will be good once the clothes come off. That being said, looks do not determine sexual chemistry. A hot looker can end up being very average in bed, and an average looker may turn out to be a real wonder… (Sorry if this is getting too graphic, but we’re grown-ups here, right?) … Oh, by the way, I’ve tried the quarter bouncing thing before… It works, kind of… but not the way you think. ;)

-MYTH:  Black Women Who Date Outside of their Race Have an Inferiority Complex.

-FACT:  This is a loaded topic, and I’ve got to say that it really depends on the person (and this goes for both Black Women AND Asian Men). I’ve known some people who had a distaste for men of their own kind because of deep-seeded reasons. I think that it can sometimes be made worse by people in their own race treating them as if they are “sell outs” or betrayers of the race. Personally, I can identify with feeling angry at times at Azn elders,  particularly because of the way they stared with scorn. I got so tired of having to be defensive. You get disappointed in your own when this happens… But I think that its possible to embrace one’s history and upbringing, and yet still find a way to accept and learn about your partner’s. The truth is, it is A LOT easier, culturally speaking, to date someone of your own race and experience, but if you care about the other person, then the effort needs to be made to embrace theirs as well. Also, there must be a commitment not to let anything on the outside tear apart what you have inside your relationship, because you are going to be tested, several times.

Okay, this part is for everyone…

-Some of us on here have a curiosity or a fetish. Personally, I think there’s nothing wrong with that, because a huge part of life is about exploring your curiosities, and I find it odd when people try and politicize something as natural as physical attraction… I say that you should just get your itch scratched, and then see it for what it is. Truth is, once we do, many of us may eventually end up with someone of our own race. Nothing wrong with that. Or, we may find something wonderful with someone of another race. Again, nothing wrong with that either. But you won’t know, ‘til you scratch the itch.

Some of us will end up in a serious relationship with someone outside of our race. Let’s make sure that who we surround ourselves with are supportive. Make sure that as a couple, we have each other’s backs, because at some point, we are going to get tested... No matter how far we think we have come in 2010, when it comes to race, there’s still a long, LONG way to go. "Tolerance" and "Acceptance" are two very different planets.

Some of us on here may even consider marriage with someone outside our race. That’s a beautiful thing… But let’s make certain that we’ve done all the necessary homework - Like making sure that we have similar goals in life, similar values, same name for God, same view on how to raise children, and how to manage money. Also make sure that we have at least talked to each other’s families, no matter how awkward or painful that may be. (That is a WHOLE ‘nuther chapter in and of itself!)… Trust me, all of it is very important.

Okay, this is beginning to turn into a book… I don’t claim that my experiences speak for everyone else’s but hopefully some of this will help, or at least spark some talk. If you disagree, then that’s great too... Wishing you all the best in finding your bliss.

…Now where’s my prize?

lol awesome post

i agree at the end of the day people are people

a woman & a man

race shouldnt really be an issue  its more about ur compatibilty w/the the other person

...and for my prize...

I suggest... A private jet down to the Cayman Islands, with Mangadollbabe feeding me a bowl of cherries...

Hey, a man can dream, right?

LMAO!   

Wow. I don't even have to say anything. WooYeah said it all for me!

Awesome Post WooYeah LMAO

Holy Mother of Butterfly balls,

You guys been responding !! Awesomeness. GREAT Post WooYeah.  Yes indeed Manga, all relationships need maintenance and TLC, however, i have found that with some specific combos, society is waiting for it to fail.  The key with anything in society (anywhere) and something i find very rare, is to take each person on a individual level.  But these misconceptions that people lock into, are detrimental to starting off a relationship (be it friend or lover). I must admit i have some views on asian men, but i dont affixiiate my self that every guy will be like that. At same time, I am like that with everyguy, when it comes to their culture, i hope for the best of what they have to offer (or at least with in my comfort range) and deal with what ever is presented to me, on a case by case.....

Hope i was clear!  Thanks for joining the convo all :)

I'm from Hawaii, and when I turned 18, I joined the service.  And I have been stationed in Japan for the last four years.  I think black women are beautiful, it's just that I really have not been exposed to many.  I talk to a lot of them on my ship, but I just don't feel that dating someone on my ship is professional, and being that my ship is really the only source of black women in Japan, there you have it.  Coming back to the states in about 4 months though.  Really had no idea that us yellow guys were so popular with black women!  Never been with or dated a black woman in my life.  Plenty of black guy friends though.

hummmm....interesting.

I've probably dated and been with more African American women then most Asians have on this site.  (This is not a brag, it's a fact.)  I say this because people conjecture all the time about this and that BWAM as if they are all knowing about relationships, but really have never been successful in a BWAM relationship.

1.  Black women, and I agree with Manga, are just women.  As we, are just men.  What we choose, in social identity and structure, are just mere constructions.

2.  If you asked seriously, how many people are in BW / AM relationships, it would be a very low number.  If you asked for a success rate, it might be even worse.  But the point is, BWAM relationships are for the most part still limited and taboo.  It takes very strong people to be in IR relationships, and even stronger for BWAMer's.  And how many ask themselves..."How can I help change this, or take away the stigmas involved?"

a.  One of the main problems are that people are more caught up in making things look pretty than being real.  While inwardly, their are fears that are triggering...such as "What would my family/friends/co-workers think?  Instead of face them, they put the front up as-if they knew what to do... Which follows...we are all human an fallible, we are all gonna fail at this.

b.  No one should be scared, and have other things outside themselves decide who they CHOOSE to be in a relationship with.  I am a person that believes that the future is more important than the past.  A relationship is forged in the present and pushed to the future...with force.  If you are not strong enough to overcome such forces and pressures in your life, you are not ready for a BWAM relationship.

3.  I find that most threads end up bashing BW or at least kind of curving that way.  We, Asian Men...or just Men in general have a lot of stepping up to do in the relationship front.

4.  I think it is important that we come together and experience one another in a real way, instead of giving B.S. talk, which I see so much of, and so much fall and fail from.  Sometimes you just have to have the heart to see things through for the fate of the future.

BWAM is going to be normal...BWAM forever!!!

this is a great topic lol

i think one reason asian dudes have trouble talkin to some girls cause they think that those girls would rather have someone with a huge package. i think a big part of it is because there's this myth that asian dude's have small ones and if your asian you kinda fall into that belief and no matter what size you are, you tend to think its small and you feel embarrissd. dude.. as long as yours is bigger than her's your good.. c'mon.. i think all women of all races are beautiful. i've been with a white gurl and i love her spazticity and sex is amazin, i love how mexicans are down as fuck and they have alot of respect. never been with a black chick tho.. maybe someday

@ Jay.... couldn't of said it better.........Im so tired of hearing about the small Asian man Myth... every man is different below.... Some would be surprise... I've seen prove live in person, but nothing small yet (only on TV)......... I won't go into sexual details i'll keep it  clean here :)

*am/bw out in the wild*

so i'm at starbucks like usual and i see this couple. i know the pic is shitty but they look to be enjoying themselves.

she was kinda hot too. cute face, with big titties. and had about 5" in height on the dude when they both walked out haha. i thought it was kinda cute. i know it's a shitty pic but i didn't want to look like a creep and snap pics at strangers so i discreetly moved my iphone over. i just wanted to share.

but this is hardly rare around here, but i thought i'd put in my $0.02 here.

Totally agreed JT. I think that black women tend to have a stereotype that is completely opposite of the Asian stereotype. Shy vs outgoing, timid vs out spoken, small penis vs large penis etc etc.  You can try to ignore stereotypes all you want, but in the end, people are afraid of rejection and the stereotypes about these 2 ethnicities would suggest that a black woman would turn down an Asian guys advances 99% of the time. That's a hard mountain to climb for any guys who falls into this and believes it.

Thats a cool picture Tim! By the body language they seem to be having some interesting conversation and quite engaged in it.

As an Asian born and raised in South America, i grew up exposed to both cultures, at home following the Asian (Korean to be more specific) culture, and out of home exposed to the Latin American influence with friends, food, music, dancing!!! I dated Latina girls and not because out of preference, but because i can date whoever i want to just as simple as that; however, i still get the stereotyping of being the geek, the quiet guy, the leper, the small guy, and when they get to know me i become a surprise.

Stereotyping is all in human psychology, i think. When a child is learning how to speak they don't learn any word out of magic; for instance, the word apple would be saved into their brains by having three basic components, first an image/picture of what an apple looks like, second the way the word apple sounds like, and third how you have to write apple. Then when the child hears or reads the word apple the brain automatically will process that information and the child will have a mental image of what that word represents and vice versa when the child sees an apple the brain will process that information into the word apple. OK too many apples here.

My point is that stereotyping sadly will be unavoidable because of the same reason of us having "apple" in our brains, our minds get an instant response of what we see, what we touch, what we smell, what we taste, what we feel, and the response or perspective that we get comes from education, media, society, hollywood, etc and those perspectives, opinions and conclusions could be either positive or negative. But that is slowly changing, the world is becoming small, where there is more curiosity, more openness, more access to information, more interrelations between different cultures, more travelling, all of those facts will "reprogram" our thoughts, making us ignore the stereotypes or change the stereotypes.

P.S i am no neurologist, psychologist, or anthropologist, i am trying to explain in a fancy way few of my experiences and i hope what i wrote here makes sense to those who read this

Hmm, for me I've never cared about any of the stereotypes of Asian guys. I find them very interesting. I'm actually put off by my own culture (well in the area I live in, the Black guys seem to unfortunately always fit the stereotypes) and more attracted to and curious about Asian culture. While I like guys of all colors, I honestly can't see myself being married to a Black guy but someone of a different race.

I know I don't fit the stereotype of a Black girl so I know I shouldn't judge and be bothered by the stereotypes of Asian guys. The only thing is I am a quieter person and it would be harder seeing as most Asian guys I've met are quiet as well. It doesn't bother me that they are quiet, I actually enjoy being around quieter people seeing as I like to try to figure them out. But I just think it would be harder for two introverted people to get to know each other. Still, I think if I can get past that block, then it would go smoothly from there.

Ok, I'm gonna try and make this short. Well as and black girl with foreign parents (from nigeria) I have some of the same problems when it comes to dating outside your race/ethnicity as asian guys/girls do. Some people try and use it as an excuse not to get close to people outside their race, and I really hate that. They say that "that's how they were raised" but my parents always say I'm gonna marry a nigerian guy, and that never stopped me from liking people outside my race.  It really bugs me that sometime in the future, when I want to get married, if I bring home a guy who's asian or any other race my parents won't except them. Truthfully, I don't know who I'm going to marry or what race he's going to be, but it really doesn't matter to me. As long as their is love between us it doesn't matter to me what color his skin is. And that is the end of my rant. :]

Stereotypes were made in the past to keep minorities down IMO.  I won't lie ive only dated 3 black girls in my life but each one was a good experience, and everyone has to admit it blacks and asians make the best looking kids lol

Well I have dated a few Asian men myself.

I agree with V tho. I think for the most part men in general care more about what everyone around them will think of the girl.

I was recently told by an asian guy that i was his perfect type...but his parents would never go for it.

I think people are too afraid of their families. My family already knows I'm gonna be with who I want.

Too bad not everyone has the balls to say that.

"but i didn't want to look like a creep and snap pics at strangers" lol, too late.

I dated an asian man before..I feel like the stereo types are stupid and most of the time ignorant people broadcast does "type of thinking"

-Povo ignorante estúpido

Is there any asian men in the Tampa, fl area I will be moving there soon and hope to make friends amd find a nice guy. Let me know ...

what prize? :o

i love black females :D

Boo to dating one race! Why limit your options? I for one love all colors of the rainbow ^^

i absolutly love asians! i've never actually dated one before but i seriously want to, i just find them super attractive. my schools pretty much an all black high school, i mean you have minorities but 98% of the people are african american. theres only like 10 asians out of 2,000 kids.lol. and one of them happen to be one of my closet friends. when i first met him i had the biggest crush on him, but i got my feelings and hurt and was turned down. he told me he wasnt attracted to black girls and it really lowered my self esteem. i have faith that eventually ill find a me a little sexy asian...i just have to be patient! he'll come one day :)

I like black women

My last gf was from florida.  At first, she put up a front, trying to be all gangsta, trying to push me away.  But I just kept on coming and she eventually became this soft, caring, extremely different person.  I found it very interesting how she talked to me and how she talked everyone else... Well, this is my experience with black girls

Love can be a strange thing but it shouldn't be confined to race. I prefer to date outside my race and I don't think it's any different than dating within your race. Situations and people are always the same with their emotions. If it is genuine and real, race would never be a barrier to it.

Great forum. Don't worry what others/detractors/haters thinks of you. One love.

Well I'm a black female who happens to be interested in asian men. I grew up in dubai but never met many asian guys I found myself attracted to. I recently moved to canada and seen a few really cute guys who are asian but they never seem to make a move or even consider me an option. I find it frustrating and must admit it plays with my self esteem to think that a guy you like isn't attracted to you because of your race. Anyways I just wanted to put my two cents in. and hey all :) nice forum!